It should come to not shock to anyone to learn that I am a nerd. A lifelong member of the Lambda Lambda Lambda social fraternity. This was not always something to be proud of, especially when having your pants pulled down on the school bus*. But over time I learned to embrace my destiny. It is indeed written in the stars that I am destined to fratrinize with the motorheads, geeks, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads, and every other doofus under the sun. Be proud of who you are, as a wise man once said. Embrace the fact that nerds can also be sext as all get up. After this realization, I have found myself attracted to nerdier types. Ladies like Tina Fey, every member of The Craft, Meg White, and the immortal Lisa Loeb. But it has come to my attention that one, and only one, lady should be dubbed the…..
ULTIMATE NERD HOTTIE
Our winner burst into the spotlight with a ferocity unseen before in the modern world, and then faded away just as quickly as she came. She left her stamp on the Great Wild Nerd Kingdom, never to be forgotten. Her name may not be familiar to you, but I guarantee you know her face. Well, I guarantee you know her face if you watch the exact same movies as I do……but you get my point! She brought the pain as the hot nerd girlfriend in not one, but two, comedy classics: Revenge of the Nerds and Real Genius. For a refresher I present the two following instances of sheer hot as the sun nerdiness:
Ahhhhhhh, nerd love. Is there anything finer?
Slow it down, darlin’. You’re gettin’ me all tangled up inside.
Her name is Michelle Meyrink (nerdy name, double points!) and she has won my heart. It’s amazing that someone as beautiful as her only found roles as the nerd in B movie type comedies. She had a small part as Diane Lane’s best friend in The Outsiders and in other Valley Girl, but she’s mostly known for these two roles. As Judy, Gilbert’s accordian playing girlfriend, in Revenge of the Nerds:
And Jordan, Mitch’s scuba loving, sweater knitting girlfriend, in Real Genius:
But, sadly, she completely disappeared from Hollywood around 1988. Hell, I can’t even find any pictures of her online. Anything after the 80’s is non-existent, which is a shame. Her IMDB page lists practically nothing, except the odd fact that she practices Zen Buddhism and lives in a shack in Canada. Wow, taking that nerddom to the extreme. I like it.
It’s a shame she didn’t get more involved in movies, because she obviously has a talent for comedy. Both of these movies are in the running for all-time favorite comedy, especially Real Genius. She makes the scenes she’s in, and my little nerd heart goes a-flutter every single time.
Thus, therefore, ergo, I now officially proclaim Michelle Meyrink to be………..
THE ULTIMATE NERD HOTTIE*** Not that this happened to me or anything
** This cannot be disputed, as I am King Shit of Nerd Mountain. I have a crown and everything.